Saturday, October 10, 2009

she has an "active imagination."

as part of my "conference work" on the subject of evil i got assigned to watch the blair witch project. i told my don that henry james' the turn of the screw (which he'd previously assigned me to read) freaked my out a little when i was reading it late at night and would catch my reflection in the black of the windows, or when i would lean on the kitchen table which sits wobbly atop one of the world's worst flooring jobs. his response was, "have you seen the blair witch project?"
"do you want to watch it?"
"could you? would you do it?"
"yeah, sure, i'll watch it if you want me to. sure"

so i did. alone (a medical situation took my viewing-buddy from me). in broad daylight. with my cell phone and ratty homemade cat and copies of our town and weetzie bat sitting next to my computer. and it wasn't so bad. yet.

things change for me in the dark.
like with the turn of the screw.
like how i took my fastest showers ever for a time after watching psycho.

but i think i watched it in the right circumstances:
daylight (which is fast lessening as i type).
and then tonight i'm going into the city with a group for a girl's birthday.
we're gonna laugh.
we're gonna go to a restaurant.
we're gonna watch the new york neo-futurists perform too much light makes the baby go blind.
we're gonna come back to bronxville and i'll probably have to walk/bike half mile back to my allegedly haunted apartment, past woods (well, sort of woods, more woods than we've fucking got in chicago!), and into my apartment where two of my three roommates won't be, because they're out of town this weekend. and the third roommate is the one i don't really talk to much and we aren't friends or anything, so i can't really talk to her). and i'll have to fall asleep in my room alone, for the second night alone. and i can't decide if leaving the bedroom door open or closed is wiser.

neither is wiser!
because there is nothing to be wise about!
because at the end of the movie it said "WRITTEN BY:_______!
because it's all fake!

and i won't even be thinking about anything.
i'll be thinking about writing.
writing short plays!
and planning tomorrow's radio show!

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