your underwear is showing. there is hot caramel in your bangs.

how did that get there?

whowherewhat.

her, that one, the perky smile, the south side accent, high ponytail, and loud shoes. her.

standing next to that tattooed man with the dragon necklace.

you really like me?

one hand on my cell phone the other on my heart. break for typing.

"Hello all! Ahh very excited, but just let me know when to expect you so that im not showering/wearing my retainer etc :)"

i got that text message this morning.

i don't know who it's from. nope.

i have one guess. but the part about "expect you" and "retainer" don't make sense with that person.

when you are hiking down dock street try not to hit the tourists. don't second-hand-smoke-kill their babies after a long day. don't look at those people on the boats and wonder when one of them is going to jump off that huge fucking ocean(lake)liner to their imminent demise in the LAKE. when you look away they will cast anchor and you nod. yes, there went their body. i heard it hit the water and according to half a dozen philosophies, i'm sure, if i never turn around then it surely was their body and i can't be convinced otherwise.

was i stood up?

was an hour too long to wait?

did you buy me a beer and then end up drinking it yourself and leaving ten minutes before i got off work and fifty minutes after you got off work? did you bike to pilsen wishing you hadn't while i stared forlornly at the chairs packed on to the tables and the lights all out at the billy goat tavern and grill cheezborgercheezborgercheezborger the outer porch patio all locked up. so i mistook a bro on a fixed-gear with a handful of facial piercings for you and he mistook me for someone else and stopped his bike and asked if we had met at...........

me: no oh, i don't know you, i'm waiting for someone who looks like you i thought you were someone else

bro: oh ha, yeah, i just did the same to you,

me: okay well, goodnight!

bro: yeah, nice bike,

me: thanks, you too.

COME BACK. i want to ride home with you. with anyone i don't know.

i guess i'll just call her back, that x-best-friend from grade school, oh my gosh, is that your live voice on the other end of the phone? it is! omgggggggg. oh my goshgoshgoshgoshgoshgoshgoshgosh. i don't take the fucking lord's name in vain no. i use fifties slang and hold down a summer job. mmmmmmmkay?.

listen chica, i'm excited and terrified. us four gals are gonna have to talk a mile a minute to catch up with each other. can we do it. i just stripped that retarded nude nail polish off my nails this morning. less wind resistance. i'm gonna need it.

(but pause okay.... i need boy advice. for realz. now i want to tell ya'll a story i need ya'll to do that girly shit where everyone sqeals and then i need ya'lls' help. understand?)

I GET THE CAR TONIGHT. suck it. i get a nice long drive way the fuck out north west from the neo-futurarium and you bet i'm gonna be singing the whole way. singing at the top of my lungs taking breaks to curse like hell at the assholes in the street. oh man, blackhawks-drunk street assholes.

i'd like to coat my arms in hot fudge and give you all a hug. it would be warm and messy, which is one of the best ways to be.